Posts Tagged: some people call this comedy

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contra-indication:

ultrafacts:

Source For more facts follow Ultrafacts

"Cole once hosted a party in which the attendees discovered that they all had the word "bottom" in their surname."

This man is my hero.

He’s like a Monty Python character.

(via lopsidedown)

Source: ultrafacts
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Oh my god I hope some of you have read Brandon Sanderson’s Stormlight Archive books so you can truly appreciate how terrible my ensuing joke is

What do the Stormlight peoples call their children’s mud pies?


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justacoffeeshop:

doctor, I can’t stop singing what’s new pussycat

sounds like you have tom jones disease

is it rare?

it’s not unusual

(via billyrandomnerd)

Source: justacoffeeshop
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unsurpassedtravesty:

dutchster:

hey

I am, in fact, on the record as saying that all cat meowing is inflections on the word ‘hey.’

Dogs, meanwhile, express only one thought when they bark: dog.  Not “I am a dog,” or “dogs exist,” but the sheer platonic truth that is “Dog.”  This is why one dog barking will set off others: the sheer ecstatic joy of the truth of Dog drives them to a fever pitch.

(via cleolinda)

Source: dutchster
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wilwheaton:

jetgreguar:

baconmoose:

carnotaurus-sassytrei:

I stared at this for a few seconds but once I got it, I chuckled.

SIGH.

I’M SO ANGRY

FLATTERY, CARL!

wilwheaton:

jetgreguar:

baconmoose:

carnotaurus-sassytrei:

I stared at this for a few seconds but once I got it, I chuckled.

SIGH.

I’M SO ANGRY

FLATTERY, CARL!

(via kantpunch)

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awesomephilia:

awesomephilia:

hungarian:

do moms diss each other with “ur son” jokes

ur son is so stupid, he thinks your birthday is on mother’s day

ur son is so uncool, he’s the cause of global warming

(via billyrandomnerd)

Source: hungarian
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veeisagenderneutralname:

can’t there be a boob transferring system, like oh you want more boob, i want less boob, here is boob, now we have a twin-like connection and can sense when the other is in trouble

wonder twins lactivate.

(via sashaa-blouse)

Source: dykevibes
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leupagus:

disappointingpopsiclejokes:

Disappointing Popsicle Jokes

HOW IS THIS A DISAPPOINTING POPSICLE JOKE

(via anniethechoirnerd)

Source: disappointingpopsiclejokes
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small groups of rogue scientists

STEM cells